Sunday, January 30, 2011
This weekend marked the one year anniversary of my mother's tragic death and it was a relatively good weekend.  I did not think it would be but I am coming to remember some of the deeply spiritual things that I use to love about this time of year and I am trying to infuse them together with the memories of what I have lost.  I have been working a lot with the hypnotherapist around removing blockages and not allowing those old memories to taint the hope that I once carried so firmly.  It is working and little by little I am feeling more myself and more able to belief in the power of my own manifestation again.

So this weekend I celebrated the turning wheel of Imbolc by going to the gym and being present in the needs of my body.  Three days in a row at the gym was very uplifting and I feel great!  I have stopped smoking and tomorrow will make one week.  Thanks to Jenny (the hypnotherapist) planting the seed in my head that it would be a great present to my mother on her death anniversary.... it stuck and took hold.  I feel good about it and it is one more thing I am letting go of that is a result of her accident.  I started smoking again when she was in the hospital.  It was one of the only vices I had to take care of myself while dealing with the horrific situation.

I spent some time with a witchy friend and reconnected with her over coffee.  It was wonderful.  I have spent some time taking care of business at home and preparing for Pantheacon.  All things I needed to do for one reason or another.

So, with this turn of the wheel and the creeping energy of the sun peeking through, I chose to enjoy my weekend the best I could and honor the Gods for giving me another year to remember my mother with.  I know that if I continue to honor her in her life with me then she will truly live forever; as do the Gods and the ancestors.

May your Imbolc be blessed and filled with the knowledge that the dark half is ending and the light will once again return.
Friday, January 21, 2011
Sometimes a chain of events will lead to what feels like moments of chaos and unexpected series of events. That is what this week has been for me. With the combination of coping withtje anniversary of my mom's accident, dealing with sick kids, huge decisions and a stressful week at work, I am more than ready for a week of calming energy ti help rejuevinate the soul. While 2011 is going in the right direction to bring closure to the hos of last year, it is weeks like this that serve as reminders of what was almost all of last year.

I'm the new year I have made it a conscious decision to acknowledge that I am grateful those days are done and hopeful that when periods like this do happen, I know it is just a moment. I have been doing a lot of internal work to recharge the batteries that became so drained from the emotional demands of last year and those are the things I want to continue to be grateful for. Today I feel like I have some direction again and even though it is not all the way clear, I have some ideas as to where I am going.

Redefining a dream for myself has been one of the biggest challenges I have struggled with, my old dream depended on having my mom here and freedoms I no longer have. With that, it has been hard to see the visual but it is getting a little easier now.

So this weekend I am focusing on decluttering the last week from my energy, planning next moves and staying in a state of mindful gratefullness so that I cam be in a place for manifestation. And just maybe the full moon will support my weekend journey.
Sunday, January 02, 2011
This has been an overall good weekend.  I was able to spend some time at the movies with the hubbie on Friday and going out to lunch since we had daycare.  It was nice to get out and be just adults.  Friday night (new Years eve) we stayed at home and drank sparkling cider with the kids and my two nephews.  Jon, Robbie and I did our little new year prayer for peace and happiness in the new year and then we lit candles.  

Saturday morning I got up and went to my second hypnotherapy/NLP session with Jenny Knowles to work on releasing, opening up to new information and finding balance.  It was a good session.  We did a technique that I have never done before (although I have heard of it) called Emotional Freedom Technique or "tapping".  I liked this although it was uncomfortable at times and hard to deal with because part of this was getting into the emotional state that I struggle with and then use this technique to support breaking of patterns.  Wow, that was powerful and emotional.  A lot of work was done around feeling the helplessness from what has happened in the last year.  

Amazingly I was able to support my son with using the tapping techniques later that night when he got pretty emotional thinking about my mother.  It seemed to help both of us.

The end of New Years day ended with tarot readings and laughs with my friends in the Berkano Babes group.  We ate chinese food, home made cupcakes and did tarot readings for hours.

Interestingly I got a very clear message in both of the events throughout the day (hypnotherapy/NLP and tarot) was that I need to allow myself to be in the moment and not worry about fixing things in the future.  Using resources that I have right now is important and more productive than the pressure of finding solutions to all that is happening.  So I am taking this into the new year and working on being in today.

I am entering the new year with some hope and openness of what is to come.  

P.S.  I would like to give an honest referral to those who might be looking for a way to change old patterns, support new and positive thoughts and open the way to manifestation and goals.  Jenny Knowles is the hypnotherapist that I have been seeing and she is very good.  I recommend her with high enthusiasum.  She is honest, open, empathetic and has a great gift for supporting the discovery of what the client wants and needs instead of inserting what her goals might be.  Her website is http://effectivehealinghypnosis.com/.  

Happy New year everyone.
Blessed Be








Hubbie and I

Hubbie and I