Rev. Crystal's Full Moon Blessings

It is so interesting how the universe throws curve balls to assist with learning and growing. And more often than not, those learning experiences are harsh and hurtful. So then the question really becomes, how do I want to deal with life in the face of such unfairness, hurt and pain?

Sometimes that question is hard to answer. I know that I would like to consider myself to always be exactly where I need to be, and sometime I know I am. But I also know that having faith can sometimes mean that I am just walking thru whatever is put in my way because the rewards are going to be great in the end. Even if nothing makes sense at the time.

I know that I want to always walk with the goddess at my side. I know I want to represent myself as a priestess in the eyes of the spirit. So that begins the process of leading me to a place of understanding that I must just continue to walk, despite the pain, despite the confusion, despite the lack of hope at times. A priestess just continues to walk, for it is her path to the Gods.

And so I walk..............................................

The universe has a way of twisting fates so that lessons are learned. Interestingly enough, sometimes that is a hard concept to grasp, especially when it is your fate and future in question.

So I have struggled off and on for a while now with the question of whether I should become not just a leader in the community but a teacher or mentor. After my first experience with someone who was suppose to be my "teacher", I just concentrated on my path and mine alone.

But after doing that series of meditations and connecting with Halmina my spirit guide earlier this year, I know that it is a part of my path. I know that by not taking this step I am hindering my own spiritual growth.

Many in the pagan/wiccan community have continued to support me and are supporting me with this decision as well and that feels good. I am thankful to my sisters in the coven because they are more than just friends but they are family. I am thankful to a new survivor of the old group that I am able to get to know and also to a old group member that I have been able to reconnect with. All of these things streghthen my closure of the old and blossoming of the new.

And I am grateful to the old group and my experiences there, good or bad, because I learned a lot about who I am and who I am not. I learned a lot about what is important and what isn't. And it taught me what kind of teacher or mentor I want to be.

Sometimes growth is hard but in the end, it is all growth baby!!!
Blessed BE!!!

P.S. Don't forget to live your truth!

Hey there all! So we moved this past saturday and everything is wonderful! Well, the move itself was stressful and lots of work. And we are still finishing some stuff at the apartment and unpacking at the new house. But overall things went very well and I can't complain about the work because the pay off is a great place in a great neighborhood with great schools!

Kevin started school today and said he really likes it. So that is good so far. Hopefully he will use this opportunity as turning a new leaf with new options.

My mom seems happy about everything but says she feels like she is on vacation and will still go back home. It hasn't sunken in that this new place is home now.

Me personally, I am just amazed the the sun comes up so early and bright out there and that so far everyone is so nice and pleasant. We went to Chilli's and the lady actually held the door open for us when we were leaving, thanked us for coming and hoped that we would come back again. Wow, what a difference.

And I went to the Barnes and Nobles there last night for the first time. It is a nice one and I am happy about that of course.

Well, after things are together, we will have a BBQ or something fun.
BB!!

Greetings all. Just thought I would update the blog and let everyone know that I am moving. We are finally moving out of the ghetto and to a nice area. So of course I am nervous as hell but it is good because we are going to be in a really good neighborhood with great school and less crime.

I am hoping that it is a big move up in life for the whole family. AND I will be able to host circle so I am excited about that.

Let's see, any other news? Robbie is close to being potty trained, yippee!! I am still working on creating my own tradition, super yippee! I am still writing monthly articles for Paganpages.org but haven't picked up my book in forever.

Getting geared up for moving, pagan pride festival on may 6th and a mother's day craft show. whew, I need a clone.

Blessed Be!

Greetings all!! Well, first lets start with welcoming the coming of spring. Ostara is a special time of the year and in reflection we can always see the impact that the growing stregnth of the sun has on our lives.

I for one am welcoming the coming of spring this year, for the dark half was a hard one. For this holiday I have spent some wonderful time with friends, the coven sisters and my family. We are continuing to try and keep the bond strong so that it may withstand the dark times.

So, good news............. I finished my program with the acupressure institute. I am very proud of that. My business is growing and I am scheduled to do something like 10 or 11 shows this year. In addition, a very close friend and I am jumpstarting another business venture with massage and actually looking for a space as well.

I am already in the planning phase for the Salem trip this year and looking forward to that. and it looks like the family might be going with me as well!!! That will be fun!

I recently took a class to connect with my spirit guide and learn to channel and it is awesome. I am working hard to developing that skill and so far so good. My spirit guide is awesome and it is amazing how connected you feel with the universe when you confirm that there is something else there. Awesome!!

The family is fine. I continue to send my wishes of support to the universe for each and every one of them. Hopefully the light has many good things in store for everyone.

So today I am grateful for the opportunity to see the coming of the light because it is that reminder that the wheel continues to turn and we are never truely stuck. Life will continue to manifest itself and we will continue to grow inside.

Blessings to all.
Crystal

So, a lot has happened, of course. My life just seems to work that way. Things at home are the same and we are still learning to live life on life's terms.

My business is taking itself into so many different areas. I am now making so many different things, including candles, that I actually have inventory!! I am already signed up to be a vendor at the Pagan Parade Festival in Berkeley and I am excited about that.

I have one more class left in school and I am taking it next weekend! Yippee!! It is an accomplishment for sure! I will actually be doing bodywork at the pagan parade in may! www.paganparade.org

So besides that, the coven is great. everyone is still together and we continue to grow together. We are truely an awesome, blessed group of women. Can't believe it has been almost 2 years together as a group after leaving the mess we left behind. What an awesome accomplishment. In addition, everyone is growing by leaps and bounds. So many of us are doing our own businesses and perfecting our crafts. It is beyond words.

Well, I must also include here that I have had the pleasure of reuniting with some old friends that I had lost contact with. My long lost friend, that is more like a brother to me, (JOHN) has found me and we are talking again like old times. it is a good feeling and I am so happy! I also got to go to dinner with Leah and that was great too.

These are the things that help me balance out the dark times.

Marian and the babies are good. They are gorgeous of course. I am so blessed to be in thier lives.

Robbie is peeing on the potty every morning now, yippee!! So we have progress. And it is amazing how he is so smart now. He thinks he is a CSI agent, which just cracks me up.

Anyho........... love, light and all that jazz. May the goddess bless you in the coming year. I am hoping the same.

Until next time,
Crystal

I am soooo excited that the holidays are over! The holidays always represent unreal expectations for people. That is one reason that I do not enjoy the commercialized mainstream holidays anymore. Everyone forgets what they are really about.

So since last blog post many things have changed. Neither of the older boys are home right now. It continues to be a hard road to travel but we have been hanging in there.

It is just Kevin and Robbie holding down the kid fort but we are doing ok.

On another tip, I have made a new friend in Georgia and what a wonderful person she is. She is the HP for a tradition and coven called the family wiccan tradition. I have been getting some much needed feedback from her about my spiritual path and it has motivated me to find some of the answers on my own. I have done a lot of meditating and feel that I truely know what my calling is and where my path is going. That is definatly growth for me! LOL

So, with that I am continuing to move forward on my quest to teach and heal. I am almost finished with acupressure school. I am very excited about that and actually met a teacher who inspired me soooo much. Her name is Alice and she is a wonderful human being. She spends her time between here and Africa helping the villiagers there. She was such a breath of fresh air and also a person who put some flame behind my spiritual behind, so to speak.

So, speaking on teaching....... I have a new article on witchvox and have been given two columns on a new ezine called paganpages.org. This month my two articles are pagan christmas and Wiccan ethics "Harm None". Check em out!

http://www.witchvox.com/va/dt_va.html?a=usca&c=words&id=10254

http://paganpages.org/

Well, turkey day was good. It was nice to have a day where we did nothing but cook and be with one another, although we are missing one. We are saddened by the turn of events with one son losing his mind to the streets and extremely happy about having Jonathan back home. It is so strange how fate and life works. We lose one son to the streets only to get our other one back.

I am hoping that the lord and lady are looking after my son while he is out there searching for the lessons he has to learn. I only hope he doesn't pay with his life.

During Thanksgiving we all sat around and went around the circle telling what we were thankful for. It was nice to have everyone in the same room and being grateful for one another.

The dark half of the year has definatly taken a toll on this family this year but there is always a ray of sunlight amongst the dark. I am so looking forward to the rebirth of the sun so hopefully it will symbolize the coming of the light back to this family.

I must say though, we are hanging tough and continue to hold onto one another. We are continuing to be by eachother's side throughout this all.

Thanks the goddess for the good times so we can get through the bad.
Blessed Be!!!
Crystal

I am having the hardest time getting Kevin into a suitable school that isn't full of kids who don't give a shit and an administration that doesn't either. It feels almost impossible to find a good school for our kids that is within our district or suitable. The red tape within our school system is ridiculous and impossible.

I am looking into Charter schools for I feel they are the wave of the future. Hopefully that will work out better than the crap public schools we are stuck with. We can continue to thank the terminator for the school improvement!

Crystal

Well, in light of my last post I thought it was a good reason to post this. For the last several nights Kevin, Robbie, Jon, my mom and I have been creating herbal bath salts and oatmeal milk baths for presents. It is such a great feeling to watch the kids get excited about creating things and working with herbs. Kevin did a great job and created some awesome recipes.

What a fun experience and something that any family can do. I don't know if the rest of the world gets such joy out of having herb time with the family but I do.

Blessed Be!
Crystal

For all the parents out there, I am sure this is a topic that hits home for all of us. It is an interesting thing to find spirituality and enlightenment and want to share it with those you love. But there is such a fine line between trying to raise your family with faith and enlightenment versus forcing beliefs on your family.

I know that I want my kids to feel the magic of life and know that there is something out there. I want to raise them in traditions that will pass onto thier families as they grow up. I want to give them the opportunity to find peace with the harsh lessons of life.

I find myself thinking about how to raise and run my family with tradition and spirit without forcing a path. I don't care what path they chose, just learning to do the footwork to find thier own spirituality.

So where do I start? I have been really thinking about what options I can chose to get them involved in activites that get them engaged in nature and spirituality. Hiking, picnics, cooking special meals, etc. Hmmmm............so much to think on.

I know that mainstream religious parents may not have the same trials that we do because thier holidays are open and recognized. It feels harder for me because I do not celebrate what the calender states.

The job of a parent never stops.
Crystal

Life is such an interesting journey. Sometimes it feels like a roller coaster that you can't get off of and yet you are not sure if you should get off.

In many ways I am very excited because my oldest son has come home. There isn't an emotion to describe the cross between excitement, happiness and fear but if there was then you would know how I feel.

I am hopeful at the thought that he is being given the opportunity to fix all the wrongs in his life. But of course we all know how hard it can be to appreciate the opportunities that are in our face. I hope he understands that everyone doesn't get a second chance and when you do you should grab it like there is no tommorrow.

How strange life is that I have felt saddened by feeling that I lost one son recently and then my oldest son reappears. I just hope that one day I will have all my family together again and healthy...........and whole.

My son Kevin is my rock. I don't know that he will ever fully understand that but I hope he knows how much I love him and look to his face for reassurance that things are ok. My son Robbie is my spirit. His excitement for life helps me face the world. Keith is always in my heart, no matter where he is. I can only hope that he learns his lessons fast and quick so he can move on and chose his fate instead of letting life take him hostage. Jonathan never left my heart. I shut the door to that part of my heart several years ago to shield myself from the pain and to perserve the image of that little boy I wanted to remember. I hope they all know that I am here for the long haul and once you become a parent, by blood or spirit, you can't just turn it off.

Although I feel all alone sometimes, I know that I am not. I can only hope that I can pass on some of the lessons I have learned in life to save my kids from learning them the hard way. Isn't that every parents hope? I can't always take away the pain but I can atleast give hope.

Today I am grateful to my faith, I know it is the reason I have continued to have the strength to open my eyes everyday and rise from the comfort of my bed to brave through a world that sometimes has no answers. I will continue to do the right thing when no one else is looking and face the storms of life, even when I feel I have no hat, coat or umbrella to shield me from the rain. I carry the power of the God, Goddess and Universe on my side, so I will march on.

Everyone deserves a second chance, I only ask that they take it. Once it blows away in the wind it is almost impossible to get it back.

Blessed Be.
Crystal

Well, It has taken me a while to post about the recent events of life. So much has happened and there is so many places I could start, so I will start with Salem and good friends.

My trip to Salem, MA was awesome and it is hard to describe how much fun it was. I was in a strange place with two of my closest friends. I was able to spend some time with just me and my needs for a change. Salem was beautiful and the atmosphere was amazing. I have never been in a place where there was so many pentacles and pentagrams everywhere. THE CITY LOGO IS THE FLYING WITCH FOR GOODNESS SAKE!!

Jody, Christine and I got to go to several museums, reinactments/plays, and a ghostly footstep tour where we got pictures of orbs and one of a possible spirit!! And of course we got lots of shopping done. I am very grateful for such awesome and wonderful friends.

Things at home have been up and down. I have been suffering with panic attacks and recently went to the doctor who is performing some tests and prescribed some medication. In addition, the family has been dealing with the struggles of raising teenage kids in todays society. It is amazing how the world has changed and scary to think of where we are going.

But to the credit of the family, we are hanging in there and trying to dodge the turmoil that may come our way. I especially want to say that my son Kevin is such a strong soul and inspiration for everyone to continue to survive in a world that can feel so uncertain. I am grateful for that in my life.

The twins are awesome and beautiful. There faces remind me that there is peace in the world. I can't believe how fast they are growing and sometimes want to freeze time so I can just hide in thier innocence. I hope they love me as much as I love them, although I doubt they could ever imagine how important they are to a person like me.

Robert continues to run circles around everyone like he is on speed. Sometimes I wonder how to keep him grounded but then I remember that it must be a wonderful thing to only have to worry about whether grandma is gonna take you to target or walmart for a hot wheels toy. And it is in those moments that I remember how important it is to be able to be so free and I envy him. It is a blessing to be able to be around such a free spirit and look into his eyes that look back at me like my own. It is like looking into a mirror but the reflection shows an excitement about life that I am missing sometimes. It is a good reminder of how my eyes slant and curl up at the ends when I am smiling or happy. Just thinking about it makes me smile now.

The dark half of the year is definatly apon us but the witch's new years is right around the corner and with it comes an opportunity to let go of the past year and welcome the new. It is now a good time of year to work the dark/crone energy and release some of the things that keep us down. I hope everyone takes advantage of that, I know I will be.

Blessed Samhain everyone. Thank the goddess for another chance to learn the lessons the universe has to teach. Thank her for another turn of the wheel.

Blessed Be!

Ok, so the kids are back in school. Keith's first year of highschool and Kevin's first year of Jr. High. So far so good. Little glitches along the way but that is to be expected.

Keith is playing JV football for school and we are super excited about that. We went to the scrimage last friday in Vallejo and he did really, really good. We are so proud.

I took some pictures and I will upload them to the site really soon. There is a game this Saturday so I will post how it went.

Robert turned 4 on Tuesday!!! I can't believe it!! And Keith's birthday is Sunday the 11th and he turns 14!! Everyone is growing so fast and it is exciting and scary at the same time. I want so much for my kids and of course I am terrified that they will get caught up in the streets and bad choices. I don't think I have ever prayed so much in my life.

And last but not least, for the first time ever............................. Robbie pooped on the potty last night!!! And then an hour later he pee peed! Hopefully we are turning a corner with this diaper thing!

Blessings are a coming,
Crystal

Well............. Jody, Christine and I are going to Salem, MA for vacation the first week of October. We decided to do something nice for ourselves and go across the united states to check out all the cool exhibits, tours and shops, in addition to the October Fest they have every year. The Harry Potter convention is the same weekend.

So I am super excited and scared at the same time. I haven't been on a plane since jr high school, yikes! And this will be the first time I have left my baby behind since he has been born, my mom since she has been disabled and the whole family for that matter. I don't think I have gone on vacation without them since the beginning................. over nine years. So I am super, duper nervous and feeling guilty. But I will be fine and I will enjoy it to the fullest!

Only one month away............................

Sorry to post so late. I decided that since so many things have happened since I last posted, I would post a series of entries to update everything, instead of having one super long post.

I went on vacation with the family, Christine and Jody to reno. We rented a really nice three bedroom house in the residential area of reno. It had a nice covered sun deck and a hot tub.

We relaxed a lot and of course went to the casinos several times. Robert loved Circus Circus and keeps asking to go back to this day, LOL. We went to several buffets and ate till I almost popped at the Peppermill. They had such good food!

We went to the mall out there and did school shopping and had the opportunity to go and check out the local reno pagan shop.

We had a grubbin BBQ and ate way too good. It was a damn near perfect trip and even got to stop in Truckee to go to the Sweets Candy shop!

What a good way to enjoy some time off!
Crystal

And the wonderful Joesph. I wish you could see his eyes but I will post another one of both the babies soon! 

Beautiful Gracie! She looks so much like her momma! 

This is one of the best pictures that Marian has taken of Robbie. 

Another pic of robbie!