Rev. Crystal's Full Moon Blessings

I didn’t know what to expect on my labyrinth experience for I have never done it before. Obsidian, Ariana and I went into a corner on the side of the labyrinth and blessed each other with meditation oils and then we headed for the opening.

There were several things that happened in the beginning of my walking meditation that became very profound in my meditation. As soon as I began walking the maze my lower back began to hurt. I was surprised by this and couldn’t understand why it was hurting.

As I was walking it was hard for me to focus my thoughts in the beginning. The beautiful live music was playing, candles were lit and the repetitive sound of stomping feet helped me begin the process of moving deeper into my meditative self.

I noticed as I was walking how much anxiety I had around going thru the maze, feeling scared that I would fall off the trail and mess everything up. I had this feeling like if I fell off the trail and messed up that I would be responsible for messing up everyone else’s path. I had a lot of anxiety over parts of the labyrinth that were harder to see, like I could not see the path clearly and didn’t know where I was going.

Walking the maze was hard, my back was still hurting and I was tired. Every time I thought we were at the end another curve would come and take me away from the middle, the prize. And finally I made it to the middle.

I felt such a sense of relief and accomplishment. We got to the middle; hugged each other and then I sat on the rock. I was thinking, “Whew, that was hard”. And then I had this realization that I had to go back and do it all over again to get out. It was at that moment that everything came into view. I understood what this meant and how it applied to my life.

It was showing me that I have to work hard and it is painful but it doesn’t stop. Once I finally reach the destination I can rest and regroup. I can revel in the accomplishment but then I have to get ready to get back into the fight. I don’t get to stay at the rock.

As that realization hit me I started to cry. I started to understand that my journey is in the journey. My lessons will come from the journey and not from the accomplishment. So who am I to think I have the answers or know what to expect when that is not in my control. What IS in my control is my ability to move forward and keep putting one foot in front of the other.

What also made sense to me was that I get focused on the outcome and don’t stay present in the journey. Instead of walking the maze and allowing myself to turn the corners with ease, I was trying to rush to the middle and would lose my balance. And just like in life I lose my balance with the twists and turns.

So I geared myself up, sat with my coven sisters and cried, then got up and started my journey again. This time I took my time coming out. I didn’t walk slower but I did take my time around the corners. My back didn’t hurt and I was able to enjoy the journey a little more. I got out of the labyrinth and felt that sense of excitement and joy once again but I knew that my journey had only just begun.

I sat with my husband tonight and we meditated for hours on our porch with the incense burning and music playing. It was interesting because when we were driving home I noticed the smell of fall in the air and the crispness of the air. But I felt such a heaviness on my chest, a sadness. As we were driving in the traffic we passed a overpass that had a ton of flags hanging and people standing there waving at the traffic. I knew in that moment the energy I was feeling was the residual energy of what many people were feeling and thinking about today. 9/11.

So tonight when I sat on the patio and allowed the elements to wash over and ground me, I knew the connection that I had with the divine energy was very strong in this moment. I could feel the collective energy of the community, I could feel my husbands energy, I felt the power of the earth/air/fire/water, and I harnessed the spirit within me. Interesting how in one moment I felt so connected to everything and to everyone.

It was also interesting that during the meditation, there was times when I could feel myself expanding my energy. Does that make sense....like pushing my energy field beyond that of my aura. Something I will continue to work with....

Blessings of new beginning, new power and the new moon to all.