Monday, February 22, 2010
12:09 AM | 
Posted by
Crystal Blanton
I have been thinking for a while of what to write and what to say. I have resigned myself to the fact that there are no words to express what I have seen or gone through in the last month since my mother's accident. The world as I have known it has gone away in a blaze of flames that consumed my mother's life and my sense of security. My mother has always been my rock, she was consistent in her love for me and always supported me in finding the layers of my being. I cannot remember a time when she told me she would disown me for my thoughts or actions. She wanted me to find myself and be who I am, live my life with honesty and integrity. I honor her sheer ability to pass that on to me.
I am not sure how to continue to move throughout my life without her by my side, she was such a part of me..... and I was such a part of her. My son completed her. It has been so strange to hear everyone's tales of how she adored me so much. I always knew she loved me, a lot, but never all the other things. I saw her do that over Robert and never knew that she did that to me as a child too. She had such love. She was so beautiful.
I am ashamed at how much I took her for granted. She was always such s trooper that I just adapted to her being super woman. I told her I loved her everyday but now it just doesn't seem like it was enough. I wish I could have said it more. I wish I could tell her thank you for every single thing she did for my family, every value she taught, every meal she cooked, every pick up from school, every diaper she changed, every page of homework she helped with, every hug she gave, every floor she mopped, every smile she smiled and every load of laundry she did. There just isn't enough time to say enough thank yous.
I believe in the powers of the universe to make things right and to take care of her. I just have to believe that she is ok and that I will live to my fullest potential, that my family will live to it's fullest potential.
May the Gods love and protect us all.
I am not sure how to continue to move throughout my life without her by my side, she was such a part of me..... and I was such a part of her. My son completed her. It has been so strange to hear everyone's tales of how she adored me so much. I always knew she loved me, a lot, but never all the other things. I saw her do that over Robert and never knew that she did that to me as a child too. She had such love. She was so beautiful.
I am ashamed at how much I took her for granted. She was always such s trooper that I just adapted to her being super woman. I told her I loved her everyday but now it just doesn't seem like it was enough. I wish I could have said it more. I wish I could tell her thank you for every single thing she did for my family, every value she taught, every meal she cooked, every pick up from school, every diaper she changed, every page of homework she helped with, every hug she gave, every floor she mopped, every smile she smiled and every load of laundry she did. There just isn't enough time to say enough thank yous.
I believe in the powers of the universe to make things right and to take care of her. I just have to believe that she is ok and that I will live to my fullest potential, that my family will live to it's fullest potential.
May the Gods love and protect us all.
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Hubbie and I
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